(no subject)

SO I'm walking up the stairs in my building and the nicest set of tits I've ever seen comes bouncing down in a tiny white t shirt and no bra and it's fucking cold and she was out in the rain....
Then I get this complex that my tits are too small and I get mopey while I do my laundry. Tood comes in at 10:30 ish and before either of us can say anything he rips off my shirt and man handles my boobies, "Aww honey how did you know I needed that?"

Then he curled up on the couch and watched "Never Been Kissed."... without getting the ice cream first. I said, "Honey, we have movies that don't suck quite so much."
"It doesn't matter..."


Todd court is this morning.
"Get up honey."
"No."
"You need a shower."
"NO!.... Maybe that's a good idea."
"Do you want to wear my pinstripe suit so you can look like a mobster?"
"No."
"I have a suitcoat with really long tails and matching slacks."
"I'll just go home and get my nice clothes."
"You better leave your deflector beanie and goggles in the car, and take out the tounge ring."
"Do you think the judge will let me off if I have sex with him?"
"Probably."